But let’s not pretend that we, as a culture, don’t worship at the altar of youth. Don’t get me wrong, there are advantages in a 45-year-old guy. He’s got the job and the home and the car, and been divorced with a kid already.If you’re over the age of 40 and have ever said, “But I’m told I look five years younger than my age”, then you’re not immune to it yourself. And nobody has more choices than a 28-year-old woman. So if a woman finds it more appealing to just step into that world – to jump from the prolonged adolescence of the late 20’s into full-fledged settled-down womanhood – that could make sense.
It’s a lot easier for a man to take out a carefree, responsibility free, baggage free, wrinkle free 28-year-old, which is why so many men try to go in that direction. Men want much younger women, but rarely do much younger women want older men.
Put another way, if a woman has an array of other quality options closer to her age range, what incentives would she have to date a man who is SEVENTEEN YEARS OLDER? Before any 40+ people get all hot and bothered about this – I am not judging you. I do think people improve with age (my 38-year-old girlfriend is nodding). She doesn’t need a guy who will be taking Viagra when she’s sexually peaking at 43.
An older man’s going to be the strong, nurturing guy who takes care of her, teaches her, and treats her like a princess – the kind of relationship that she probably lacked growing up.
Hey, I’m no psychologist – just your friendly, neighborhood Whether we like it or not, there is nearly a full generation gap between 28 and 45.
But I do know women, and lots of women in their 20’s. A few women may bridge this gap for lust or money or dimestore psychological reasons, but most of the women I know would prefer to date a great, stable 30-40 year-old – who also knows who Limp Bizkit is. But don’t forget, you and your younger girlfriends are the EXCEPTION. When I was in my late 30’s I became involved with someone 15 yrs. The age difference did not seem especially significant during the 5 yrs we were together.
Okay, Evan, I agree mostly with your opinion on younger men/older women. I mean, I can see why an older man would want to date a younger woman – physically that is, but why would a 28-year-old woman want to date a man 45 or more? I can totally understand why older men go for younger women.
There’s no denying that they’re, for the most part, in better shape, with better skin, and less baggage from broken relationships.
But see, for men who covet younger women, it’s not whether you look good for your age – it’s what age you really are. If she wants to date a guy who is 6’2”, makes 0,000+, likes skiing, is within ten miles of her house and five years of her age, you know what? All she has to do is go on Match.com, and wade through a few thousand applicants. There are many other things that are attractive about older men. They can afford nicer restaurants and vacations and have cultivated greater tastes in the arts.
They’re more experienced, more chivalrous, and more likely to want to settle down than a twentysomething party boy.